


Of all things, why Speed-dating?

by Anemone_nemerosa



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, F/M, Getting Together, M/M, Mentions of Snape being really mean, Mentions of homophobia, Misunderstandings, Modern AU, POV Remus Lupin, Remus Lupin & Lily Evans Potter Friendship, Sirius Black & James Potter Friendship, Speed-dating, no magic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-15 22:35:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,766
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29443446
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anemone_nemerosa/pseuds/Anemone_nemerosa
Summary: Just because Remus was in a whiny-mood for the past two weeks, Lily really didn't have to trick him into attending speed-dating!
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin, background James Potter/Lily Evans Potter
Comments: 8
Kudos: 85
Collections: The Candy Hearts Challenge





	Of all things, why Speed-dating?

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so moch @goodboylupin for givin me the prompt "YOU ARE GAY" and the whole idea of the challenge!  
> Big thanks also to @justtoarguewithyou for betaing and @mooncat457 for listening to all my ramblings.
> 
> I had a lot of fun writing this and hope you enjoy!

"For fuck's sake, Lily!" Remus yells after the quickly retreating car before giving up. Lily would not turn around to collect him. With a sigh, he enters the anonymous building, scuffles his way to the top floor and into a dull room. It was clear that the organisers of the "All-gay speed-dating party" did their best to make the sterile room of the universities' community centre somewhat inviting but there is only so much paper tablecloths, red plastic cups and mini-pretzels can do.

Remus takes a mental note to murder Lily in her sleep before plastering on a somewhat excited smile that turns out to be a bit unnerving if the look of the reception-girl is anything to go by.

"Welcome, I'm Jenny. May I have your name?" The girl gets over Remus' undoubtedly weird expression rather fast and shoots him an encouraging smile.

He takes a deep, calming breath. It was not Jenny's fault that he was dumped here, "Hello Jenny, my name is Remus and I think my friend already registered me or something."

"Remus...," The girl repeats while her finger moves down a list, "Here you are! And your  _ friend _ already paid the little Soda-and-pretzels fee. Here's your badge, take a seat and we'll start in five minutes."

The way she said 'friend' makes it very clear that a lot of guys use that as an excuse to come here, Remus realises while settling in front of an unoccupied table.

Remus does not really listen to Jenny explaining the rules of speed-dating, nor does he bother to look at the other 'dates', being far too occupied with wallowing in self-pity.

It is not very often that he finds himself in such an uncomfortable situation but when he is, it's Lily's fault. Always.

He doesn't remember when it started, given that he and Lily were born only a few weeks apart and grew up in neighbouring houses with a shared garden fence in a small town in the middle of nowhere. They had always been more like brother and sister than Lily and her actual sister, Petunia, and did everything together, including applying to the same universities and moving in together after being accepted at the same one. Lily was his everything. His sister, his best friend, and sometimes his doom.

The sound of a bell and a polite cough jerk Remus out of his thoughts and he has to blink a few times to focus on a guy with blond curls, brown eyes and the nametag 'Benji'. The conversation is pleasant enough for such a weird situation and Remus quickly succumbs into the bad habit of answering in auto-mode while letting his thoughts drift somewhere entirely different.

Right now, he prefers to think about what brought him here in the first place.

*

_ "Come on Re!" Lily whined on that fateful evening two weeks ago, sitting between Remus' legs in front of the couch while he braided her hair into a crown. He kept quiet, hoping that she would relent eventually but, of course, she did not. _

_ "Please. I don't want to go there on my own," Lily continued, ignoring Remus numerous declines. _

_ Recently, she started almost-dating this guy, James, from her Chemistry course after complaining about his over-the-top attitude for nearly a year. She would forcefully deny it, but her complaints turned into ill-disguised pining months ago. Finally, she made it appear as if he had worn her down just now to agree to a meeting outside of mandatory classes. It all made kind of sense for Remus until she began begging him to tag along. _

_ "Lils, love," Remus began for the umpteenth time this evening while affixing the end of her braid with an elastic and two bobby-pins, "why on earth should I accompany you to a date?" _

*

It's break, and while most of the other guys get up to fill up their cups or empty their bladders, Remus' ass stays glued to the folding chair. He just feels so very out of place here, out in the open, with the literal aim to find a date. It's just not Remus’ style to directly approach people or decide whether he likes a person or not after two minutes, as Lily bloody well knows. Luckily, the guys seem rather friendly and Remus is almost certain to get through the second half of the evening by distracting himself with his own thoughts.

*

_ As soon as Remus’ fingers had left her hair, Lily threw her head back to look at him, "I told you before, I don't want him to think this is a date, Re!" _

_ "But you want to date him and from what you told me, he wants to date you, too. Desperately so," he argued, not really understanding the situation. _

_ With a great sigh, Lily got up from the floor and plopped down beside Remus, "I just want to make sure he is not a secret jerk, like Severus." _

_ And suddenly it all made sense. Severus was a friend of Lily in school. Why she liked him had always elluded Remus, but Lily usually knew what she was doing, and he would never tell her who to hang out with. But then, Severus proved to be the biggest arse to ever walk the earth. Not only did he ignore all of Lily's refusals of his romantic advances, he also began spreading awful rumours about her being literally a prostitute as it became apparent that she would not agree to a date. _

_ "All right," Remus gave in, dropping a kiss on the top of her head, "But does he know that I'll come along?" _

_ According to Lily, James had happily agreed to each bring a friend to the pub, which earned him a point on the decent-bloke-list. _

*

"So, Remus, what would an ideal date look like for you?", the probably third guy with short brown hair and a grey hoodie asks, just like the other two did before him. Is there a glitch in the Matrix?

"Not like this," Remus answers automatically for the third time, fishing for some pretzels in the dish in front of him but ending up empty handed. Damn.

"Are you even listening to me?" the third one asks.

Remus might be angry at Lily and has absolutely no intention to be here, but the others were. They were looking for someone to date, potentially love and he was wasting their time. "Not really, I'm sorry," he said, looking into the other guy’s eyes for the first time, surprised that they were bright blue.

"Why are you here, then?" the guy, Jonas it reads on his badge, doesn't sound angry but disappointed. Which is worse if you ask Remus.

Because his friend is a menace, he thinks, "Because my friend wanted to help me," he says.

*

_ While James was already waiting in front of the pub when they arrived, his friend Sirius would be late. But even without James' friend, the evening in the pub went on pleasantly. James was welcoming, warm, and funny. Sure, he was a bit boisterous but somehow not too intrusive, giving everyone just the space they needed. Remus knew a lot about him already, something that was inevitable when living with Lily; but after just about an hour, he had the feeling as if had been friends with James for years. _

_ But then James' friend showed up and it was all over. Remus' brain turned to mush and ran out of his ears. He never considered himself to be superficial, but that guy was sex on legs. His long hair was thrown up in a messy bun, underlining his air of nonchalance, created by a loose band-shirt, leather jacket and an easy-going smile. Sadly, as his brain was no longer with him, Remus just avoided the boy's eyes and laughed at his jokes, way too loud to not be considered barking mad. _

_The next two weeks went by with Lily officially dating one James Potter and Remus pathetically whining over the undoubtedly straight friend of James. He had to be. Remus' love-life was cursed._ _Although Lily insisted that Remus could just ask him out and that none of James' friends would react badly, she understood his hesitancy. He asked out a boy of yet-to-be-determined sexuality two years ago and received a black eye instead of a decent rejection._

*

Finally, the second-to-last date. Just 5 more minutes and Remus is free to go home and plot his revenge against Lily, who secretly set him up to an all-gay speed-dating, did not tell him where they were going until she dropped him off at the place and then had the audacity to drive off, his curses trailing behind her.

However, this is the first time, he really looks up to see the face of his date and only because the guy across managed to blurt " **You are gay!** " loud enough for the whole room to fall silent.

"Your observational skills are astounding", Remus snaps sarcastically looking up at the boy across with a raised eyebrow before his jaw drops to the table.

Sirius, James' hot friend, was grinning at him like a madman, staying quiet for just a second before starting to ramble excitedly.

"I was so, so sure you were not. That day we met at the pub I flirted with you like mad, but you didn't even react. But James begged me to be on best behaviour that day, as not to scare off his beloved Lily or her precious friend and so I tried to be as direct as I could without just plainly asking you out. And then, after I would not shut up about your dimples, he forced me to come here as if I hadn't listened to him droning on about Lily's everything for almost a year. But now, I'm quite sure he knew that you would be here. You know he is very good at not telling secrets but embarrassingly bad at hiding that he  _ has _ a secret."

Sirius’ grin begins to falter at Remus' prolonged silence, not that he could've interrupted the string of words flowing from Sirius' mouth, anyway.

"Oh," Sirius mumbles eventually, likely interpreting Remus' silence as rebuff and beginning to fidget awkwardly. Remus brain finally kicks back into action, leaving no room for second guesses. He grabs across the table, stopping Sirius' hands from tearing apart the tablecloth.

"Go on a date with me? One longer than two minutes?" Remus asks, hoping for the blinding smile to return to Sirius' face.

The smile does come back. Maybe he didn't have to behead Lily, after all.


End file.
